“"Motherhood after 40 is like the ocean—vast, powerful, and ever-changing. It challenges us, but it also reveals our deepest strength and resilience." - Anacani Walters

Hey gorgeous,

If you’re reading this, chances are you’ve either stepped into the beautiful (and sometimes overwhelming) world of motherhood later in life, or you’re considering it. First, let me say this: you are doing an incredible job. Motherhood, no matter when it happens, is like a rollercoaster—there are highs that make you feel like you’re flying, and then there are those unexpected twists that leave you clutching the safety bar for dear life. And when you add in the complexities of being over 40, it can sometimes feel like the ride is a little…bumpier.

But guess what? You’re not alone on this journey. Together, we’re going to explore the physical and emotional challenges that come with motherhood after 40. And more importantly, I’ll share tips on how to rise above those challenges with grace, sass, and a whole lot of self-compassion.

The Physical Rollercoaster

Let’s be real for a second. Our bodies don’t quite bounce back the way they did in our 20s or even our 30s, right? I know you feel me. That postpartum bounce-back everyone talks about can feel like a far-off dream when you’re juggling night feedings, backaches, and trying to remember where you left your keys (or let’s be honest, your sanity). But here’s the thing—your body just did something incredible. It grew and nurtured life. So if you’re feeling tired, sore, or like your energy is on backorder, that’s perfectly normal.

Embrace the Season You’re In

First, I want you to give yourself permission to rest. Yeah, I said it—permission. We’re often so hard on ourselves, trying to keep up with the expectations we’ve set based on some Instagram-perfect version of motherhood. But girl, you’ve earned the right to slow down. If you need a nap, take it. If your body feels achy, honor it. And for the love of all things good, please don’t compare yourself to that 25-year-old mom influencer with abs you could bounce a quarter off of.

Gentle Movement, Not Perfection

The key to feeling physically strong and capable as a mom after 40 isn’t in hardcore workouts or chasing that elusive pre-baby body. It’s about movement that nourishes, heals, and strengthens you. Try incorporating gentle yoga (I see you—don’t worry, we’ll get that downward dog looking good), mindful stretching, or even a calm walk by the water. The goal isn’t to push yourself to exhaustion but to connect with your body and show it love. Remember, progress is progress—whether it’s taking a few extra steps or finding a moment to breathe deeply.

Emotional Overwhelm is Real (and Okay!)

Now let’s talk about the emotional side. Whew. Can we agree that this part doesn’t get enough attention? Between managing your new identity as “mom,” juggling all the responsibilities of life, and dealing with hormone shifts (hello, postpartum hormones, we didn’t miss you!), the emotional load can be heavy.

Acknowledge the Feelings (Even the Messy Ones)

I want you to know it’s okay to feel overwhelmed, tired, or even a little lost sometimes. It’s part of the journey, and it doesn’t mean you’re failing. It’s okay to not have it all together—you are allowed to have those moments where the dishes stay piled up, the laundry doesn’t get folded, and you’re feeling a little frazzled.

But here’s the magic: when we allow ourselves to feel without judgment, we give ourselves space to heal. Start by taking a few minutes each day to check in with yourself. Ask, “How am I really feeling right now?” It doesn’t have to be fancy—just taking that moment to acknowledge your emotions can create a world of difference. Plus, you deserve the same compassion you give to everyone else.

Practicing Mindfulness to Stay Grounded

When life feels like it’s pulling you in a million directions, mindfulness can be your lifeline. Trust me, I know that finding time for meditation when you’ve got toddlers running around or work deadlines looming can feel impossible. But mindfulness isn’t just about sitting in lotus pose for 30 minutes (although if you can, go for it!). It’s about finding pockets of peace throughout your day.

Here are some quick, easy ways to practice mindfulness, even with a busy mom schedule:

• Breathe: Take five deep breaths before you get out of bed in the morning. It will help you start your day grounded and calm.

• Mindful moments: While washing dishes or folding laundry, focus on your breath or the feeling of the water on your hands. These little mindful actions can anchor you to the present.

• Gratitude pause: At the end of each day, think of one thing you’re grateful for. This can help shift your mindset, even on the toughest days.

Building Your Community of Support

Listen, no woman is an island. And I’m here to tell you that community is everything. If you’re anything like me, asking for help can feel awkward, even though we know it’s necessary. But here’s the secret: you deserve support, and you don’t have to do this alone.

Find Your Tribe

Whether it’s an online mom group, a few close friends, or family, having people you can lean on makes all the difference. Surround yourself with women who get it, who understand the challenges of being a mom, especially after 40, and who will lift you up. Community doesn’t have to be huge, just meaningful.

And if you’re feeling like your current circle isn’t giving you the support you need, I want to encourage you to seek out new connections. Join a local yoga class, participate in online forums, or connect with moms who share your values and experiences. You might be surprised at how uplifting it is to find other women walking a similar path.

You’re Allowed to Ask for Help

Can I be real for a second? Sometimes we’re our own worst enemies when it comes to asking for help. Whether it’s pride or feeling like we need to be supermom, we push through until we’re burnt out. I want you to hear me when I say: you don’t have to do it all alone. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, reach out for help—whether it’s from your partner, friends, or even hiring a babysitter for a few hours of much-needed you-time.

Other resource to help you along your journey

Wrapping It Up: You’ve Got This, Mama!

Flying above the challenges of motherhood after 40 isn’t about pretending it’s easy—it’s about embracing the journey with all its beautiful chaos. It’s about giving yourself grace when you need it, surrounding yourself with support, and remembering that you are enough, exactly as you are.

So, whether you’re in the thick of toddler tantrums, trying to sneak in a yoga practice, or figuring out how to balance work and family life, know this: you’ve got the strength and wisdom to rise above the waves. Keep moving, keep transforming, and trust that you are exactly where you’re meant to be.

Now, tell me, what’s been your biggest challenge as a mom over 40? Let’s talk about it in the comments—because we’re in this together, mama.

With love and a little sass,

Anacani

P.S. Don't forget that you are doing the best you can, and that is enough! Inhale the Peace, Exhale the Chaos.